Let's talk about my date with The Ego. It's a rather lengthy story, but really worth it. Let's call him Jack. I actually think I handled this one ok, so this date is less of a lesson and really just a good story. He may still be out there ladies...
Jack, 45, ad exec, funny in his emails. Cute too.
My excitement to meet him quickly waned when he was 1/2 late. Self absorbed doesn't begin to describe this guy. He talked about himself for about the first hour. Then he said "Oh you work with children at your job." Actually no, I don't. In a joking fashion I told him that he must have his Match dossier mixed up. Instead of rolling with the joke he seriously shrugged his shoulders and said "What can I say, I like to date?" You just wanted to slap him.
He proceeded to down 4 glasses of wine while I sipped a beer. He suggested we order food. I got the cheese plate and he got a sandwich. When the bill came he said "I'm going to make the bold suggestion that we split the check." Of course, one can think of a millions lines I could have thrown at him in response, but honestly I was in shock, so I obliged and then just tried to get out of there.
I went in for the hug and he gave me a kiss on the lips. It lasted about 5 seconds. I tell you this because as soon as I got in the cab, he sent me a text that I am an amazing kisser. Either a) I am or b) the guy is off. It was definitely b. I made the mistake of texting back a snarky comment "Really- that was nothing" I guess he read it as I meant there was more to come because he would not leave me alone after that.
Well, the slew of texts and emails began. I wish I could screen shot all of the texts but I deleted most of them. He sent 4 the day after asking if he could see me again and also sent me an email asking me to dinner and drinks-- I wanted to reply I can't afford to date him.
When I still ignored him, he texted me why I was being so cold, he thought we really connected. Mind you, we talked for about 2 hours, but it was mainly him doing the talking. I told him I was a little turned off by his emails and that I don't move that fast --I even tried to scare him off and say I was looking for something serious! That just lead to a second barrage of texts. Saying I should give him a chance, he is one of the good ones, not a perv (ok), and he really wants to see me again. These were all separate text messages. FINALLY I just emailed him that I am also seeing someone else and it is getting serious. He wished me luck and I thought I got rid of him.
Nope. I get a text from him a week later Below is what it said.
"So as you're not into sappy... my version of Hugh Grant singing "Don't Write Me Off Just Yet" from the (decent) rom-com MUSIC & LYRICS, right? I'm not kidding...I recorded it on a dare on my phone. Easily email-able. Utterly humiliating. Alternative, sweet and quite moving.:)"
Yes, he had recorded a song and wanted me to hear it. I HAD to egg him on so I asked him to send. I wish I could figure out how to post songs, and will do once I figure it out. His final communiqué was "There is a not so hidden meaning in that song." I thought the meaning was pretty obvious and this guy's ego must be so big that he would probably be proud if he found out I posted his song.
That was the end of Jack. Finally.
I guess the lesson in this is that some guys are so involved in themselves they have no idea you wanted to ditch them 10 minutes into the date. I probably should have and ladies, you should to. Don't entertain a loser who is just going to sit and talk about themselves.
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